Today is our 6th Legal-Anniversary! Where we ran to New Mexico and got the paperwork done after they passed the Marriage Equality Act in that state. (We had a ceremony over 20 years ago.)
I am grateful for the way we have learned and grown together through circumstances that are emotionally painful and daunting. We’ve kept going even when my heart has broken and all I wanted to do was run. We’ve kept going. It’s not like relationships are easy, but being Special Needs parents makes it even tougher. Loving is easy, but staying together can be challenging for many.
We have a LOT on our shoulders as many couples do, and we have Liberty. Full time all the time. We have Liberty. We’ve learned to find ways to hang on. When I am overwhelmed and tired to the core, I look for joy.
There is always joy to find. If I can’t find it, I make my own. Everyday I make sure to sing some little ditty. I just sing. It makes me happy. It pulls me up. Another thing I’ve continued to embrace is dancing. I bust a move at least once a day. Randomly. Probably embarrassingly. Doesn’t matter. There is joy for me and I will claim it.
Last night we had the beautiful chance to dance at the St. Andrew’s Trucking where they have food trucks, a great band and lots of spiritual community. I am blessed by this community and how they have open their hearts for us.
We danced. Wonderfully, Rachael danced with me. All
by ourselves. We got to dance! Some would be embarrassed. Others would feel a spectacle. I don’t anymore. I HAVE to take those moments when I can.
You never know when you’ll get another chance to dance. (It’s been over two YEARS since we had a night out without Libby.) You might think I’m complaining, but I’m not. It is exactly what it is. We don’t have a lot of caregivers available with time to spare, but we’re working on finding and hiring more.
We have chosen to include family in our vacations and get always. Time is precious and there are no regrets. Over the years, we have culled out evenings after Libby is in bed. We just need to find a way to have some get away time together.
With the addition of Libby’s evening cry-fests, we’re really going to need little breaks. We have found a tincture that is helping to calm her and we have new schedule that is helping.
So, today we are going to load up, have a meal, and go grocery shopping. Ya know that grown up life.
Keep looking for joy. And when you can’t see it make your own. If you can’t then you’re welcome to join me on the dance floor.
There is always joy to be embraced.
